Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Possible topics

Topic 1: How cell phones have changed us socially.

Topic 2: Censorship- books, movies, music, even internet.***

Topic 3-Fast food & link to obesity

Topic 4- Divorce

Topic 5- Abstinence programs

Grammar & Revising

   I chose paragraph 3 to revise because after seeing the feedback and learning new grammatical techniques, I was able to apply this new found knowledge into the paragraph and I now think the paragraph flows much more effectively.

   Conserving is water probably one of the most important things to do because water is a crucial element in our lives. Recycled water is useful and beneficial in agriculture, landscape, toilet flushing, and also in artificial lakes. When a person brushes his teeth, he can choose to waste gallons of unused water by leaving the faucet on or instead, he can simply turn it off and use it sparingly. Recycling water not only "decreases the diversion of water from sensitive ecosystems," as explained on the US Environmental Protection Agency website, but it also reduces and prevents further pollution by being used for irrigation because the reusable water is rich in nutrients and safer than using synthetic fertilizers. It's amazing how one little drop of water can help in a big way.


Monday, October 22, 2012

Grammar

   On the top of my writing list, grammar has always been something I've focused in on. Like Peter Elbow writes, "Mistakes in grammar lead readers to notice other weaknesses." I believe this is   extremely accurate because if I find a mistake and it's so simple to correct, I lose interest and may assume they aren't as articulate. I'm not saying I've never fallen victim to grammar mistakes, but as I learned in revising my paper, I can carefully spot simple mistakes and correct them. It's crucial to me to have a paper free of mediocre mistakes because it does weigh the paper down and diminished your credibility as a writer who wants to be taken seriously. I believe that because my grade school instilled a lot of attention on grammar, it was easier to grasp once I began writing essays as I got older. Once again, I'm not saying I'm perfect at grammar, but I am that annoying person who spots grammar mistakes in other people's work and stresses on correcting these simple errors! I hope to continue to learn more grammar tricks and tips and hopefully one day have a first draft free of errors.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Final Draft

   "Water is the driving force in nature," Leonardo da Vinci once said. It's true because without water, earth would be cut off from one of the most important resources. Sadly, if humans continue to pile on the trash, infest our waters, and pollute, it will slowly lead the human race down a scary path. It is clear that a lot of people's poor choices in not recycling and polluting has slowly caused negative effects to our water supply and nature in general. If we do not take initiative, humans could quickly spiral into an irreversible future where we may not have any clean water at all. It only takes one person to make a difference and there are many ways to help. Recycling and identifying the importance of conserving water are perfect examples of simple yet effective ways we can help the earth. Humans can sit back and watch the world slowly perish, or some of us can take responsibility and try to make a difference.

   Recycling is probably one of the most easiest ways we can help. We can recycle so many things like newspapers, cans, glass, plastics, cardboard, and even water. Instead, we choose to throw out so many reusable products. It can seem overwhelming at first to try to make it a habit to recycle, but it's so simple! There are tons of websites that help explain the importance of recycling and give many examples on how to recycle pretty much anything. Recycling shouldn't be a chore. Instead it should give us hope that we can reverse many of the wrongs our polluting has done to the earth by just living a greener life.

   Water is one of the most important elements in our lives and it's sad to think many of us take it for granted. Conserving water is probably one of the most important things to do and should be on the top of our lists when it comes to recycling. Recycled water is useful and beneficial in agriculture, landscape, toilet flushing, and also in artificial lakes, When we're brushing our teeth, we can choose to waste gallons of unused water by leaving the faucet on or we can simply turn it off and use it sparingly. Water recycling not only "decreases the diversion of water from sensitive ecosystems", as explained in the US Environmental Protection Agency website; it also reduces and prevents further pollution by being used for irrigation because the reusable water is rich in nutrients and safer than using synthetic fertilizers. It's amazing how one little drop of water can help in a big way.

   A lot of people today may not know or even care about the importance of water. It's scary and sad to think that many humans take water for granted, when we all should try to do our best to conserve this important element. I can't stress enough on how simple and effective recycling and conserving water is. Recycling may not be on the top of our lists, but it should at least be included and we should try to make a difference. But perhaps it might be how Benjamin Franklin once said, "When the well's dry, we know the worth of water." And we should not be surprised to see that realization soon.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Revising with Feedback & Nausea

   Revising with Feedback

   Finish first draft, revise it enough to make it interesting & readable, and then get two friends to read it and then after discuss it with one another. 
  •    The conversation will help you gain a better perspective and even new ideas and hopefully will allow you to decide what you think.
   Option
  1. Minimal feedback
  2. Little feedback 
  • explain idea entirely differently
  • more detail and commentary
  • remove any bumps (more clearer examples/details)
  • rearranging ideas 
This allows to remove unnecessary details, words, or even sentences. And this will allow the paper to flow and even remove parts in the paper that were weighing it down.


 Nausea

   After all this revision and feedback, it might discourage how you feel towards your paper. You or someone else may have marked your entire paper because it had unnecessary sentences. It will most like occur towards the end and you might feel that your paper is short and mediocre and you may have to rewrite the entire thing when you realize how many changes you had to make. But this will only make you a BETTER writer!

****"Now when your mind is clear you can make a simple rule to cling to later when your mind is clouded: never do major revising when nauseated by YOUR writing."****

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Chapter 12- Thorough Revising

   The first sentence of this chapter stood out to me the most: The leverage in thorough revising comes from time. I agree with this because you can spend countless hours trying to quickly revise the paper that is still fresh in your mind, or you can push it aside for a couple of days and read the paper with a new perspective because you took time off before you critique it.

My favorite points he made about revising include:

1. If piece is intended for an audience, get yours readers and purpose clearly in mind.
  •    Know who you are writing for and what you're going to write about. It's always awful reading a paper that makes no sense and also isn't interesting because not everyone can relate to it. 
2. Read over what you've written and mark IMPORTANT bits.
  •      Quick revising, you can go back and quickly change the mistakes.
3.Find main point or center of gravity.
  •    Identify why you even sat down to write in the first place! 
4.  Put your parts in order on the basis of your main idea.
  •    This allows you to list parts (in no particular order) and then develop sentences when you identify main point of each full-sentence.
When strengthening your language, you tighten and clean up your language.
  • Don't have to use fancy words or "explaining" things, just write like you normally would talk and JUST SAY IT! 
The summary of this chapter is that the main weapon in thorough revising is TIME!! The paper shouldn't be rushed and the revising shouldn't be either. If you take enough time to come up with the idea and take time off so the ideas won't be so fresh in your mind, revising will be easy! Revising isn't just about fixing your grammar mistakes, it's also about cleaning and tightening up your language. Write how you would talk and don't get stuck explaining yourself. They'll get it if you just say it!

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Draft

   "Water is the driving force in nature," Leonardo da Vinci once said. It's true because without it, we're cut off from one of the most important resources we have on earth. It's similar to the blood in our veins that pump life into us. Seeing the picture of the bird's carcass, I couldn't help but think that we're slowly killing ourselves. Piling on the trash and infesting our waters. Pumping loads of gas into our cars and consuming tons of unnecessary products. It's slowly leading us down a scary path and I wouldn't be surprised to see us leading a similar fate as the one the bird did. It is clear that our poor choices in not recycling and polluting has slowly caused negative effects to our water supply and nature in general. If we do not take initiative, we could quickly spiral into an irreversible future where we may not have any clean water at all. It only takes one person to make a difference and there are many ways to help. Recycling and identifying the importance of conserving water are perfect examples of simple yet effective ways we can help the earth. We can sit back and watch the world slowly perish, or we can take responsibility and try to make a difference.

   Recycling is probably one of the most easiest ways we can help. We can recycle so many things like newspapers, cans, glass, plastics, cardboard, and even water. Instead, we choose to throw out so many reusable products. It can seem overwhelming at first to try to make it a habit to recycle, but it's so simple! There are tons of websites that help explain the importance of recycling and give many examples on how to recycle pretty much anything. Recycling shouldn't be a chore. Instead it should give us hope that we can reverse many of the wrongs our polluting has done to the earth by just living a greener life.

   Water is one of the most important elements in our lives and it's sad to think many of us take it for granted. Conserving water is probably one of the most important things to do and should be on the top of our lists when it comes to recycling. Recycled water is useful and beneficial in agriculture, landscape, toilet flushing, and also in artificial lakes, When we're brushing our teeth, we can choose to waste gallons of unused water by leaving the faucet on or we can simply turn it off and use it sparingly. Water recycling not only "decreases the diversion of water from sensitive ecosystems", as explained in the US Environmental Protection Agency website; it also reduces and prevents further pollution by being used for irrigation because the reusable water is rich in nutrients and safer than using synthetic fertilizers. It's amazing how one little drop of water can help in a big way.

   A lot of us today may not know or even care about the importance of water. It's scary and sad to think that many take water for granted when we should all try to do our best to conserve this important element. I can't stress enough on how simple and effective recycling and conserving water is. Maybe seeing the picture of the decaying bird didn't affect you at all. But imagine that one day, all living creatures including ourselves go down a polluted path and lead a similar fate. Recycling may not be on the top of our lists, but it should at least be included and we should try to make a difference. But perhaps it might be how Benjamin Franklin once said, "When the well's dry, we know the worth of water." And we should not be surprised to see that realization soon.